It is so important that no matter what circumstances you are in that being able to stay calm will help you to focus and have more clarity and energy as well as make better choices . .When you find yourself having trouble staying calm and frequently feeling stressed in a medley of circumstances and situations then it may be the time to no longer avoid but to begin to understand and to change this pattern from the inside out.
RESPONDING RATHER THAN REACTING
Relationships are where we learn to regulate our emotions and yet relationships are also where we can be so easily “triggered”. When you are feeling overwhelmed and stressed it is essential for you to know that this is not the time to react but to take a deep breath and to slow down not speed up. Remembering HALT(hungry ,angry, lonely tired) in other words it is time for you to notice how you are feeling and what is going on in your body and to PAUSE as this will help you to stay calm rather than escalate and be reactive. How we speak to ourselves and others really does matter and it is certainly easier to react than respond but am sure you know by now that reacting can have grave consequences.
Reacting is often fueled by impulsivity and tension, aggression and without thought but emotion yet responding is when you are coming from a place of being thoughtful before you speak as well as aware of whether this is the time to speak and if you do speak then you are coming from a calm non threatening place. Connection is calming so first the connection needs for you to be compassionate to yourself in these difficult times since if you begin to attack and shame yourself than you cannot maintain a calm perspective and everything becomes distorted. .This can be so triggering especially if you are a trauma survivor and your nervous system is continually on high alert for “threats”(see “Ways To No Longer Have Anxiety Run Your Life”)
MANAGING STRESS
During the pandemic we have all experienced increased levels of stress. Managing stress has to be a priority as increased stress levels can effect us physically as well as mentally, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually .One powerful way to manage stress is to activate the Vagus nerve which can counterbalance the stress response into a relaxation mode as it helps to regulate the nervous system and keep us calm rather than in the fight/flight response. The following are some ways that can help:
Deep belly breathing: inhale through your nose and long exhale through the mouth
Loud gargling :.with water or loud singing
Foot massage
Eating more fiber
Laughter
THERAPY CAN HELP CALM YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM
Being in therapy with the “right” therapist can help you to feel safe within your own body as when you are in a secure safe therapeutic relationship this can begin to “reset” your nervous system as well as help you to become less circumstance dependent and more aware of your triggers and less reactive and more responsive to yourself and others. Please give me a call as I would love to help you in any and all areas where you are needing help in order to heal and go forward!
Please give me a call if you’d like to know more about Anxiety Therapy.