STAYING CALM FROM THE INSIDE OUT

Healing can only take place when our nervous system is calm… and healing can only take place in the present…so if you are anxious/depressed and worried and stuck in the past that can effect the healing process..as you become more aware of your thoughts and how you are talking to yourself then you have the opportunity to change your tone and your thoughts and become more compassionate and patient with yourself….that can be life changing from the inside out.

So important to understand that what is going on in our minds influences not only our emotions but there is a direct connection between our emotions and what is going on in our bodies on the cellular level as for every emotion there is a chemical component. As a survivor a of trauma your brain is often driven by the fight /flight/freeze response when faced with triggers and these triggers can be set ups for anxiety and depression and escalated reactivity rather than responding in a calm manner.…...important to know what your triggers are and staying calm and focused in the present,breathing deeply when they come up can also help you to stay in the present. The good news is that when we begin to respond in a healthy way our brains can change the old reflexive patterns of over reacting and the trauma/depression/anxiety connectiion becomes weaker and over time non existent as new healthy connections are made

IMPORTANCE OF NOT ISOLATING AND RECEIVING THE SUPPORT YOU NEED

As a survivor of trauma you are well aware how trauma can shake us to our core. One of the consequences of trauma is feeling powerless/helpless and alone …as when you experienced trauma there was no way to escape…there was no where and no one to run to for safety…during this time of COVID-19 you can reach out to friends and family by video or phone …reaching out is so important so you can stay connected with those that are “safe” people in your life.

When we go through trauma as children we are literally little hostages so when you isolate and feel more alone this actually can fuel your depression and anxiety as well as underlying shame related to trauma.You may feel alone and ashamed and have buried your pain(consciously or unconsciously) and your focus is on physical symptoms(back pain, digestive issues, skin disorders, immune disorders) You may be feeling angry and easily frustrated and feeling disconnected from yourself and others.

LEARNING HOW TO NURTURE YOURSELF

What the research clearly shows and what I have seen with my clients repeatedly is that when you have someone who is walking along this journey with you and truly “gets it” then there is the increased potential that hope and healing and restoration can take place on a deep level of the mind and heart and soul… that you can be vulnerable and honest and have a witness with you to validate and encourage you on this courageous journey as you share your experience and thoughts and feelings in a safe place with a safe and caring as well knowledgeable expert therapist.

Beginning to enjoy your own company rather than distract and avoid yourself with food, drugs.alcohol . toxic relationships or obsessive thoughts can be very healing,…Yes there is a need to balance being connected with yourself as a prerequisite to being able to connect with others as you need to truly show up in both areas of your life. As you develop the capacity to listen attentively to what is going on with you emotionally and spiritually and start making the mind/body connection: as this is essential in understanding the conscious and unconscious roots of your pain…..As you learn to reparent yourself you will also identify what is soothing and calming especially when confronted by triggers. You will then be positioned to make choices that are healthy as you will no longer be fueling your depression and anxiety but giving yourself good “food”that nurtures your change and growth.

FORMING HEALTHY CONNECTIONS

With the right therapist you can learn to set boundaries and limits and you can begin to make healthier choices in relationships with people that you can identify as “safe”and this can decrease your anxiety and depression in relation to trauma.

…you can begin to identify the qualities that are your bottom line in a relationship and be clear about what is not acceptable and learn to prevent being reinjured in relationships,as you start to see your unique value.

Your voice is extremely important in this healing process as no one can read your mind so and as you become more self aware and insightful as well as you will be equipped to communicate more effectively and assertively. As a trauma survivor who seeks and finds the right therapist: please know you can go forward and no longer have your identity based on your past experiences ..…..you are a work in progress and I will encourage you to move forward as you gain insight and understanding of who you truly are :moving forward in strength and hope and healing!

If you would like to go further in your healing journey please give me a call!